Scratch By 50: Play With Better Golfers

Graham Averill turned 50 this year and he’s freaking out. Instead of buying a motorcycle or getting a tattoo, he’s decided to try to get really, really good at golf. He started this project as a 13 handicap attempting to reach scratch in a year. He is now a 9.6. Welcome to his midlife crisis.

File this bit of wisdom under the “I can’t believe you’re just figuring this out” column. I play with a lot of bad golfers, mostly because everyone is “bad” at golf to varying degrees. “Good” golfers are hard to find. But several people mentioned in the comments of these articles that I should make a point to play with golfers who are better than me. So I did just that. 

During the last two months, I’ve had the chance to play with different golfers far better than me. Not only did I get to play a practice round with my coach but I got to tee it up on my home course with a buddy who’s a plus handicap. I also had the opportunity to play a tough mountain course with a former assistant pro who still strikes the hell out of the ball. I even got in a few rounds with a childhood friend who played competitive golf throughout high school and college. 

I approached each round like a detective looking for clues. I asked questions and had each of them walk me through their thought process at various points. I wanted to learn how a good golfer views the course and the shot at their feet so I could absorb their knowledge and use it for my own gain. 

Playing with better golfers was eye-opening. Following these sticks around the course didn’t automatically give me a better swing, but it did help me become more comfortable with my own game, while giving me a glimpse of how I need to adjust moving forward. 

Here are three things I learned from playing with better golfers. 

1. Bad Golf Happens 

Everyone hits bad shots. I’ve seen assistant pros top their drive and plus handicappers shank a 7-iron. The difference between these golfers and me is that they don’t think the bad shots are indicative of their game. 

When I chunk a wedge or slice a 5-iron, I start questioning my golf ability as a whole. Sure, I might be two over going into the 11th hole but I just hit an 8-iron off the toe into the woods so I must be terrible at golf, right? 

Not necessarily. A solitary miss is not an indictment on your character. 

2. They Are Junkies Addicted to Birdies 

The biggest difference between me and a scratch golfer isn’t our skill level. That chasm is wide but you know what’s wider than the 10 shots that separate us every round? Our mindset. The good golfers I’ve had the fortune to play with are always looking to score. That doesn’t mean they’re taking unnecessary chances. It just means they’re never out of a hole. 

Let me give you an example. 

While playing with an assistant pro, we both failed to reach the green on our approach shots on a par-4. We were each sitting 15 to 20 yards from the hole with good lies. My goal was to roll the ball close and try to get up and down for par. I asked the assistant pro about his goal for the chip shot. 

“I have one thought in this situation; hole this chip.” 

He didn’t hole the chip. The ball rested about six inches from the pin and he had a tap-in for par. But that aggressive approach, the notion that he’s never out of a hole, stuck with me. 

If I get off to a good start, I automatically go into defensive mode and try to hang on to a decent score. Better golfers are always on the offensive. They’re not trying to hold on to a low number. They’re looking for ways to make a good score better.

3. Good Golfers Talk to Themselves

This is the golden nugget of wisdom: have a specific vision for every shot and vocalizing that vision helps. 

Every single better golfer I played with stands on the tee box and describes in detail what they are trying to get the ball to do. 

“I’m going to start this ball on the right side of the fairway over that bunker and draw it back towards the center.”

They might not say it out loud but they are definitely talking to themselves and they’re using very specific language so there’s no doubt in their mind what they’re trying to accomplish when they address the ball. 

I typically take the opposite approach. Instead of visualizing a specific shot, I have a more vague, hopeful notion of where I’d like the ball not to end up. 

I don’t think I’m alone here. Raise your hand if you’ve ever stepped up with your driver and simply thought, “Man, I hope I don’t hit it into the water on the left.” 

I was playing a round recently and I was having trouble off the tee. I didn’t know where the ball was going to go and I approached every drive with more of a prayer than a plan. 

Several holes in, I decided to take a different approach. Recalling my rounds with the various good players, I stepped up to a long par-5 and visualized a very specific plan for my drive and recited that plan out loud to my playing partner. I wanted to start the ball on the left side of the fairway, aiming at a specific tree that stood above the rest of the canopy, and fade it into the center of the short grass. I stepped up to the ball with a specific start line and ball shape in mind and then executed that exact shot. 

This has been my approach with every shot since. I walk up to my ball with a specific plan, say that plan out loud, and then try to execute. It works more often than not and I have a few ideas as to why it’s so productive.

It could be that the visualization stuff that sports psychologists have been pushing for decades actually works. Or it could have something to do with fully committing to a specific shot. Or, maybe, this visualization and vocalization works because trying to do something is inherently more productive than trying not to do something. 

I think a lot of amateurs (me included) step up to the ball and think about what they don’t want to happen. We’re playing golf with a negative mindset. Better golfers seem to operate positively and proactively. They’re not trying to keep something from happening when they swing the club. They’re trying to make something happen.  

It’s a mindset I’ve tried to adopt during the last few weeks and I really like the results. 

Dig deeper into one golfer’s struggle to get better at golf in middle age and read last week’s Scratch By 50 where Graham plays chases swing speed through better mechanics.

Scratch By 50: Chasing Speed With My Driver